Had a marvellous conversation yesterday with a dear and very long time friend. She had read my previous blog Seeking and finding delicious and had a caution for me. 'Be careful when you open yourself up, make yourself vulnerable, you may get sick. I did.' Hmm this rather took me back. Eleanor is one of the most 'there's a way to resolve this' kinda gal I know. Her saying this wasn't proposing that sickness would happen. It was just a heads up not to be surprised at what does indeed appear.
My immediate counter was that perhaps her illness was always there ticking along below the radar. Or not. She has had a hectic couple of years of Board work, grand babies, planning a wedding, etc. There are many of us who completely miss the niggles and hints that our life's are out of sync. Certainly it's been the case with me a couple of times. My friend admits to being on a learning curve with this one. She has no choice.
Doing some conscious work on this time of life will no doubt bring up some unresolved muck in my life. Frankly I'm counting on it! For years I've been a follower of the philosophy of Scarlett O'Hara - I will deal with that tomorrow, .... There are a lot of tomorrows buried in my psyche. Yet I'm ready to pull out, examine, integrate and perhaps put a new perspective on my story. I believe I am more resilient now. Have a much broader perspective on the ebbs and flows of life. This puts me in a better place to welcome what shows up as I learn to sit in solitude, silence and stillness to contemplate the whole of my life - good, bad, indifferent. One of my favourite poets, Rumi, had it right.
The Guest House
This being human is a guest house.
Every morning a new arrival.
A joy, a depression, a meanness,
Some momentary awareness comes
As an unexpected visitor.
Welcome and entertain them all!
Even if they’re a crowd of sorrows,
Who violently sweep your house
Empty of its furniture,
Still, treat each guest honorably.
He may be clearing you out
For some new delight.
The dark thought, the shame, the malice,
Meet them at the door laughing,
And invite them in.
Be grateful for whoever comes,
Because each has been sent,
As a guide from beyond.
I suspect Eleanor and I will enjoy more delicious conversations about the guides from beyond.